Questions are the core of the human experience. They drive innovation, create change, and
propel humanity forward to a new age. However, while many may ask questions, few have the drive, determination, and courage to find answers to them. Today, dear readers, we want to help answer your burning questions. The ones that keep you up at night, the ones that would take hours to answer, the question of… How many small holes are in a classroom ceiling?
All students of AGHS have encountered the strange ceiling tiles the school uses, marked with dots, like a million beady eyes beaming down on you. Yet, our heroic duo decided to answer a question that no one before has dared to attempt: Just how many of these strange dots are there on the ceiling? You may have begun to count them in the middle of a stressful test, but no man, woman, or child before has ever found out exactly how many holes there are., At least, not before now.
Our story begins with our heroes sitting once again in Michael Callaghan’s newspaper class during second period. This was in the midst of AP exam season, so our heroes were reasonably exhausted, but their spirits burned with determination to answer one single question: “Hey Colby, how many dots do you think are on the ceiling?” This simple question sparked a fire in the hearts of our dynamic duo, and they set to work, counting, calculating, and working tirelessly to answer this fundamental question of life.
They began counting how many tiles there were overall. The full tiles made up a vast majority of the ceiling, a staggering 835 tiles where each tile had an awe inspiring 529 dots. The heroes understand that those were a lot of numbers, but Colby insisted on actually explaining how he got the answer.
Emme didn’t like the math part. In fact, math is actually lowkey stupid in her brain. So, she cheered on Colby as he did his nerdy math calculations.
Understanding the math, Colby proceeded on to the partial tiles. Some were 13×23, others were 4×23, some were 15×23, and some were weird corner pieces with no dimensions equal to 23 dots. Colby, near, effortlessly totaled the dots on all of these tiles, eventually working the dots into a long calculation that would reveal their final conclusion, the perfect final total of dots.
However, after they finished counting, our heroes decided to interview their classmates to determine how many dots they believed there were. Despite the hatred of Colby and Emme’s adventure, they persevered and worked to share their results with the world.
Before the final number of dots in Room 406 is revealed, the authors would like to address the fact that there may be differences between classrooms depending on the ceiling and dimensions. However, it is believed that this still is a similar average in most classrooms around the 500s wing.
As you are reading this next part, it is suggested that you drumroll from your desks to build more suspense.
The final total of all the dots is…
470,607 dots!
Now that your burning curiosity, your yearning for meaning is answered, you may finally rest easy, knowing the number of dots in Callaghan’s classroom, Room 406.
