Orange Ya Glad My Favorite Color Isn’t Yellow


Darren Langstaff

This is an image of me, Ethan. I wielded the incredible power of orange on this glorious day to run a mile in the pouring rain at the Paulding Middle School track for my Independent Study PE course. I ran a 5 minute 30 second mile, not bad especially considering that immediately prior to the mile I wolfed down an entire In N Out 4×4 burger.

Orange is my favorite color. 

Old pic from… a long time ago, I dunno. My bed was orange back then, and now my bed is even more orange. This is my version of a flex pic.

It wasn’t always, I remember that much, but I do not remember exactly when I decided that orange would become my favorite color. I know that I have always not known what to say when that infamous question is asked, “What is your favorite color?” That type of question is asked of you on a Buzzfeed quiz or icebreakers. Kids love that question for whatever reason. Because of this childish fascination with that question, as a kid I decided orange was to be my favorite color out of a childish desire to stand out. 

Since I made my famous orange picture (the image previous to this) a couple of years back I had to make a follow-up picture. My arsenal increases with each coming day.

People typically do not like orange as a color. I think it is definitely a “Hey, look at me!” color. Especially in the way I typically wear it or present it, that being in the form of neon traffic cone orange. Most people do not want to put themselves in the spotlight like that, even me. I do it to get out of my comfort zone. It forces me to not cower away and hide in a crowd. I concede it also makes me quite obnoxious. I surely am not the main character of the universe, what a boring story that would be. 

This picture is featured in an equally excellent article as this, where I detail my love for the song LONG SEASON by Fishmans, which parallels my love for the excellent color that is orange. 

It also makes me look like I get into a lot of car accidents when I bike, needing to be so bright and whatnot. I like to think to myself that it is preserving the inner-child in me. It is quite hard to retain that nowadays. As a kid, I thought that maybe being so brightly orange would carry me to the spotlight and make me seem unique enough to be one of the greats. Nowadays, I find myself trying to avoid said spotlight more. 

When I tell people orange is my favorite color I mostly get, “seriously?” as their reply. I suppose my childhood plan did not work exactly as intended. It is a fun part of my life though, to collect orange objects and clothes and attribute them to my personality. I have yet to figure out who I want to be, or who I am as a person. Most people do not easily come by that knowledge, but I know some do. So I force myself to like orange because it is something I can hold onto as a part of “me.” 

Yes, orange is seriously my favorite color. It is possible to make yourself like a color. I admit I cannot sport orange every single day. I am not perfect. Some days I do not want to be looked at; some days I do not want to defend the color. I always come around though. 

Orange, on a scale of 1 to 10 is a 10/10 color, top of the tier list. Let us explore a couple of reasons I cooked up why. 

Fire is orange. Yes, orange, not red, orange. This is not up for debate. Fire is also awesome. Sure, as a Californian I can say pretty firmly that it is not always awesome, but consider that it is, like, regarded as one of the most if not the most significant discoveries of mankind. Nowadays, electricity is kind of destroying the point I am trying to make about how necessary fire is, but let us forget that for a moment and then see how food could not be cooked without fire, and cars’ engines could not work without those tiny orange explosions going off in their engines. Every Michael Bay film could not be completed without orange fireballs. Action as a genre would be nothing without it. 

Also, a small little side note, not a big deal, a very small point, hardly a reason for mentioning it, but you know, the SUN IS ORANGE. I know it is infamous for not being able to be looked at, but I assure you that it is definitely orange and we would all be kaput without it. Plants? Animals? Nothing without that orange ball of fire up in the sky. Pretty rad color, huh? The sun is not yellow by the way. Just because sixth graders are colorblind does not mean I am wrong about this. Also, NASA says the sun is white, but that is stupid. Additionally, some of the super wackjobs at NASA are claiming the sun is blue-green. I don’t know what they are smoking at NASA, but the fact that they only mention that the sun could be orange once is absolutely absurd. Seriously, go Google search “sun” and all the first pictures you will see are clearly orange. This is a testament to how much people do not like orange. People would rather gaslight themselves into believing somehow those pictures of the sun are yellow, white, or even blue-green than just say it is orange. 

On a similar note, volcanoes spew lava, which is an absolutely glowing shade of orange. There are few things in this world that are cooler than lava. Well, from a literal standpoint, there is little in this world that is not cooler than lava because lava is very very hot. That’s the reason it is so cool! I mean, again, just like with the fire example, volcanoes definitely have a history of not being so cool for humans but conceptually they are awesome. Like, ultimate stereotypical villain secret lair type stuff. Big booming explosions of hot lava and whatnot. Metal, metal is what volcanoes are, and volcanoes are orange. 

Foxes are also orange, and they’re pretty neat. They bark, scream, and laugh like psychos, and on top of that, they steal all of your stuff- quite the resume. All of the top-tier cartoon characters are orange. For example, The Fantastic Mr. Fox, Disney’s Robin Hood, and Zootopia’s Nick Wilde. Greater yet, the best film in mankind’s creation features an orange cartoon animal protagonist, Puss In Boots: The Last Wish. Orange is the color of icons, legends, of cool kid’s movie characters. For whatever reason, all of the orange characters are roguish archetypes, and roguish archetypes are factually known to be kickass. 

Now, let’s talk about traffic cones. Traffic cones, pylons, safety cones, road cones, highway cones, or construction cones, no matter what you call them, are all utility items of legend. Typically a traffic cone is used in construction jobs, to say “hey, watch it, man,” but they are everywhere. Traffic cones are placed over gopher traps, and tiny traffic cones are used for field sports drills. Sometimes, on rare occasions, it is possible to find a traffic cone on a saxophone, because of course. Traffic cones keep us safe, and safety is extremely important. 

The color orange keeps us safe, whether it is traffic cones or reflective vests or orange beanies hunters wear so their friends do not snipe them, the color orange protects us. Orange can be found on both ends of the spectrum, covering objects of extreme harm like fire or the sun, or lava to those that protect us from harm. 

Here are some bonus mini-points of contention: Orange is such a good color they named a fruit after it. Orange is the color of cheddar cheese and mangoes. Furthermore, orange is a Halloween color and Halloween is the best holiday. 

Orange is a fire color, literally. I love the color orange a whole bunch. Orange alone is incredible but it is furthered by amazing color combos like orange and black. That is the power duo, my favorite two colors. The contrast is immaculate, between a color of high brightness and shine and a color of pure darkness. This reminds me that tigers are in fact, orange. Tigers are extremely epic, no lie.  

Anyway, yeah, that’s it. Until next time, bye.